


a proper education

by zach_stone



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Bonding, But mostly fluff, Gen, Magic Lessons, a teeny tiny bit of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-13
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-08-30 20:41:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8548411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zach_stone/pseuds/zach_stone
Summary: Angus continues his magic lessons with Taako! Featuring a report card, a harmless goof or two, a little bit of cooking, and Taako dealing with his baggage.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [chuchukelsey](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chuchukelsey/gifts).



> this all started because kelsey and i were talking about taako putting angus's report cards on his fridge if angus went to school and it just kinda.... escalated. idk fam i banged this one out in like 2 hours when i should be working on nanowrimo sooooo enjoy!

Angus McDonald was skipping down the halls of the Bureau of Balance headquarters, humming a little tune to himself and holding on tight to the strap of his messenger bag. He skidded to a stop in front of his destination — Taako’s room — and knocked on the door. There was no answer, but Angus knew that he was right on time for their magic lesson, so he went inside anyway. Magnus and Merle did that all the time, so Taako probably wouldn’t mind.

“Taako?” he called out. “Sir? It’s magic time!”

Taako’s room was a disaster zone as usual, but it appeared to be empty. Angus’s brow furrowed. Had Taako forgotten about their lesson? It wouldn’t be the first time, but he’d promised to start writing them down so he wouldn’t forget. Angus even saw a note in Taako’s scrawled writing, stuck to the headboard of his bed, that said _magic with boy wonder @ 10_.

Just as he was starting to get really disappointed, a _pop!_ sounded from directly behind him and Taako’s voice in his ear said, “Boo.”

Angus screamed, flailing backwards as he whirled around, clutching his messenger bag to his chest. Taako was doubled over laughing, slapping his knee.

“Hoo boy, that was a good one,” he said, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye.

“Y-yeah, you sure goofed me good,” Angus said, laughing nervously. “That was Blink, right?”

“Very good, Agnes, very good,” Taako said. “Yeah, it’s a real useful spell if you need to get out of a dangerous situation — or if you wanna make a little boy piss his pants, apparently.”

“I didn’t —!” Angus started to protest, but then he cut himself off, eagerness growing in him. “Am I going to learn Blink today, sir?”

“Don’t be ridiculous, that’s way above your level,” Taako said, flapping his hand at Angus. “Nope, today you’re gonna learn Detect Magic.” Taako said the name of the spell with a lot more drama and flourish than such a simple incantation merited, but Angus’s eyes went wide with excitement anyway.

He pulled a notebook and pencil out of his bag and sat down on the edge of Taako’s bed, notebook balanced perfectly on his knee. “I’m ready, sir!” he said.

Taako was regarding him strangely. Angus would almost say he looked… concerned. “Hey Ango, do you like, go to school or anything?”

Angus was a bit confused by this change in topic, especially since Taako rarely asked him about his life, but he shook his head. “No sir, I used to go when I was planetside, but there’s not a school at the Bureau since I’m the only kid on the whole moon.” He said all of this with a chipper matter-of-factness, and was surprised to see that Taako looked even _more_ concerned. “Sir?”

The expression on Taako’s face vanished, replaced with an unaffected smile. “Well lemme tell you what, kid, this is your school now. And starting today I’m going to be grading you on your magic lessons, so you better take good notes, got it?”

“Oh, yes sir! I always take good notes!” Angus showed him the pages of perfect transcriptions of Taako’s previous lessons.

Taako rolled his eyes. “Fuckin’ overachiever,” he muttered. “Okay, lesson time!” He clapped his hands together, and Angus listened in wonder as his mentor explained the spell.

As it turned out, Detect Magic was a difficult one for Angus to get a handle on. It wasn’t a cantrip like the other spells he’d learned so far, so he had to expend a spell slot every time he attempted to do it. At the end of each lesson, Taako always wrote conspicuously on a piece of paper where he was keeping Angus’s grades. He wasn’t very good at hiding it, though, and Angus saw that Taako gave him an “A” every day.

 

One day when Angus showed up for his lesson, Taako wasn’t in his room. Angus wondered if this was a test, and was about to cast Detect Magic, when he caught the scent of something delicious wafting from the shared kitchen area of the reclaimers’ rooms. He wandered over into the kitchen, and saw that someone, presumably Taako, had been cooking. It was some kind of garlic chicken, and the smell made Angus’s mouth water. There were pots and pans scattered across the counters and stovetop, and a plate of the finished chicken was front and center, garnished with what looked to Angus like elderberries.

He approached the counter, standing on his toes to get a better look. Maybe Taako had made them a meal to go with their lesson! Angus smiled at the thought, and reached out to grab one of the berries from the plate.

A hand grabbed his and yanked it away, while another smacked the plate and sent it flying across the counter, food scattering to the floor. Then the hands whirled Angus around and it was Taako, looking absolutely panicked — horrified, even.

“Did you eat it?” he said. His grip on Angus’s shoulders was so tight that it hurt, and Angus squirmed a little.

“N-no!” he said. Taako was still staring at him with wide, panic-stricken eyes. Angus also noticed they were a bit red, like Taako had been crying earlier. “I didn’t eat anything, sir, I swear!”

Taako released him, wringing his hands together and taking a deep breath. He looked around at the mess of a kitchen, at the food spilled on the ground. “Shit,” he muttered.

“Sir?” Angus said hesitantly.

Taako pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes. “Why don’t you run along, Agnes,” he said dully.

“Are you sure you’re alright, sir? I could help you clean this mess up!” Angus offered in a hopeful voice.

“I said run along,” Taako said, and then he started pushing Angus away, back towards the door.

“O-okay then, sir, I’ll come back for magic time later!” Angus said right before the door was shut in his face.

 

Later, Angus went back to Taako’s room, notebook clutched in his hands. Taako was in his bed, lounging on top of the covers with a sleep mask on. It said “Just Chillin’” on it in fabric paint, and Angus recognized the writing as Taako’s.

“Hello sir,” he said, approaching the bed. “Um, what are you doing?”

“What does it look like I’m doing?” Taako said. He pointed at the mask. “I’m _chilling_.”

“Oh. Okay.” Angus had a feeling magic wasn’t going to happen today. But in the few hours since the mess in Taako’s kitchen, Angus had been doing what he did best — piecing the mystery together. And he wasn’t about to leave without asking some questions, so he said, “Taako?”

“That’s my handle, don’t wear it out,” Taako said.

“About earlier… that food you made, that was the same food you made when those people died, wasn’t it?”

Taako was perfectly still for a moment, and then he lifted the corner of his sleep mask to stare at Angus. He didn’t say anything.

“I’m very sorry for trying to eat it, sir,” Angus continued. “Was it — was it poison, too?”

Taako pushed the mask up all the way with a world-weary sigh. “Nah, it wasn’t. Sometimes I, uh, I try to make it again. It was one of my favorites, y’know. Thirty clove garlic chicken.”

“That sounds like a lot of garlic, sir.”

“It’s a slow cook,” Taako said dismissively. “But that’s not the point. I just want to get through making it one time, to prove to myself I still can, I guess? Never really works out.” He laughed, but it wasn’t a very happy sound. “Sorry for freaking out on you like that, pumpkin. Ol’ Taako’s got some baggage.”

Angus wished desperately that he could give the elf a hug or something, but Taako was already tugging his mask back down, folding his hands across his stomach. Clearly, this conversation was over. Angus left, feeling a little dejected.

 

He didn’t see much of Taako the next few days, and when it was time for their next scheduled lesson, Angus wasn’t even sure if it would be happening. Because of this, he showed up a little later than usual to Taako’s door. Before he could even knock, however, Taako flung the door open and shoved a small piece of paper in his face.

_LATE PASS_ , it said in big, blocky letters. Angus looked from the paper up at Taako, who was grinning at him.

“You’re _late_ , Ango,” he said gleefully. “If you’re not careful you’ll get a detention in the dungeon, and if you think I’m going to defend you on trial, you’ve got another thing coming.”

“That’s not how detentions usually work, sir,” Angus said, tucking the late pass into his pocket. “I’m sorry I’m late, I just haven’t seen you lately so I didn’t know if we were still doing magic lessons.”

Taako shrugged. “I’m a busy guy, Angus, I can’t always be at the beck and call of Nancy Drew Jr., you know.” He stood back so Angus could enter the room. “So, you wanna learn some cool shit, or what?”

Angus beamed at him, relieved to see Taako was back to his old self. “Yes, sir!”

 

After several weeks of training, Angus could now perform three spells with some degree of success: Mage Hand, Produce Flame, and Detect Magic. Taako had asked him to come by for a “super special surprise,” and Angus was both excited and extremely nervous. Taako’s “surprises” were notorious for being either elaborate pranks or like, really lame presents that were usually re-gifted. Angus didn’t have his hopes set too high.

Taako’s bedroom door was already open when he arrived, and it was once again empty. Angus knew what to do this time, and cast Detect Magic. Several things lit up in Taako’s room, including the spot directly in front of Angus, where a Taako-shaped figure was hidden with Blink.

“Hello, sir!” Angus said in that direction. With a _pop!_ , Taako reappeared into this plane of existence, holding both his hands behind his back.

“Nicely done, Agnes,” he said. “I gotta say, you’re not a half-bad wizard. Not as good as me, _obviously_ , but don’t sweat it. We can’t all be tens.”

“...right,” Angus said. “Well thank you, Taako, you’ve taught me so much! Is today another lesson?”

“Not quite,” Taako said. “I got you a little something.” From behind his back he revealed what appeared to be a meticulously handwritten report card. Next to all three of the spells Angus had learned, Taako had put “A+” in bright red ink. He’d also written Angus’s name as “Ango McDango,” but that was alright. Angus took the report card and held it reverently, before looking up at Taako with a huge grin.

“Thank you sir! I love it so much!” He reached into his bag to take out his notebook. “I’m going to keep it right here, with all my notes and the late pass you gave me!”

“Oh hang on,” Taako said. “Lemme get that late pass from you, little man.” Angus handed Taako the late pass, confused. Taako pranced out of the room, headed for the kitchen. When Angus caught up with him, Taako was sticking the late pass onto the fridge with a magnet. “Perfect,” he said. “A little something to commemorate my favorite student.”

“I’m your only student, sir,” Angus pointed out.

“Listen, pipsqueak, my moments of sincerity are few and far between, so don’t push it,” Taako said, sticking a finger in the boy’s face.

“Fair enough,” Angus agreed. “But isn’t it more customary to put a report card on the fridge instead?”

“Naaaaah,” Taako said, waving him away. “Well, good job and all that, but Taako’s gotta get his bubble bath on, so why don’t you go get Carey to read you a story or something.”

“I can read by myself, sir. I’m ten years old,” Angus said. Taako was already starting to wander away. Angus looked at the late pass on the fridge, and his heart swelled. An idea struck him, and he called out, “Um, Taako?”

“Mmm?” Taako said, pausing in the doorway.

“Maybe… um, maybe sometime you could give me cooking lessons, too.” He noticed the way Taako stiffened, but he pressed on quickly. “It’s just, those macaroons you made were so good, and that chicken smelled amazing, and you know I’m lousy at cooking, sir.”

Taako gnawed on his bottom lip, deliberating. “You know what? What the hell. You wanna learn to cook, it might as well be from the best in the biz.” He shuffled back over to the kitchen and rummaged around in a drawer that was crammed with all sorts of weird junk that Taako, Merle, and Magnus had shoved in there throughout the months. “Aha!” He pulled out a crinkled apron that looked like it hadn’t been worn in years. “If you’re gonna be a chef, you’ll need a uniform.” He handed the apron to Angus, and when he turned it around, he saw that it said _Sizzle It Up! with Taako_ in big swirling letters across the front.

Taako was looking at the apron with very sad eyes, but he gave Angus a smile anyway. “So, you ready?”

Angus tied the apron around his waist; it was too long, but that was okay. One of these days he was going to find out the whole story of what happened that day Taako’s cooking went horribly wrong, but that was a mystery for another time. For now, he gave Taako two thumbs up. “Ready, sir!”

Taako grabbed a wooden spoon from the counter a twirled it between his fingers. “Then let’s get cookin’.”

**Author's Note:**

> hmu on social media to talk about adventure zone stuff!!! i love makin friends. 
> 
> twitter @queensuperjelly  
> tumblr @joshuawashinton


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